Thanks For Glistening

Well, we’re back! Did you miss us? We definitely missed you. This week we are catching each other up and discussing what friendship looks like after 30. We’re also unpacking Kirsten Dunst’s career, and so much more Xoxo,  Juan and Sloane To make a donation to Operation Helping Hands to help those devastated by Hurricane Dorian please visit this page.     

Hello, Glisteners! Wow, you look amazing. We are so happy to see you. This week we discuss our love for ASMR YouTube videos and Spirit Payton, the ASMR star that eats pickles for a living. We’ll introduce you to the viral phenomenon that is Mukbang, where people film themselves overeating and get praise for doing so. It’s so fierce. Additionally, we share our favorite products of the week and how we recovered from our latest mini-nervous breakdowns. xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @ThanksForGlistening Twitter: @HelloGlisteners

We are so so so happy to be back in your hearts and homes once again. This week we discuss Luann de Lesseps and her drunken battery case, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child on Broadway and what we are wearing to our funerals. xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @ThanksForGlistening Twitter: @HelloGlisteners

Juan and Sloane are so happy to be back in your hearts and minds. Thanks for Glistening is your home for hilarity, celebrity gossip, news, ridiculousness, and malarkey. Each week your hosts, Sloane Steel and Juan Torres-Falcon talk at you until they get tired. This week they tackle Omarosa Manigault Newman, Meghan Markle’s Father, loneliness and weight gain. Additionally, Juan and Sloane ask the following questions: What's going on with Jennifer Anniston's Nipples? and Why does Mango flavored seltzer taste so bad? xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @ThanksForGlistening Twitter: @HelloGlisteners

DOLLY WILL NEVER GO AWAY AGAIN. We are back from maternity leave and our feet are still swollen. We catch all the way up and get ready for the rest of our lives together. Sloane tells us how cute her baby is and what motherhood is really like. Juan tells us about his new endeavors and his greatest fear at the moment.  Instagram Shoutout of the Week: @cheatchic_   Xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @ThanksForGlistening Twitter: @HelloGlisteners

2017 knows no chill at all. This week we are exploring the idea that maybe Richard Simmons is just not that into us. We are eager to discuss all the Beauty and the Beast drama: Emma Watson’s underboob and Lefou’s new Gay orgy scene. Rupaul's Drag Race is moving to a new apartment with washer/dryer in unit on VH1 avenue and we’re analyzing the pros and cons. REMY MA went in on Nicki Minaj and Juan is gonna get you together on the whole gag. “Get Out” is for sure the Ben Carson story and Jill Zarin is back.  Juan addresses old white private citizens in his opening statement. Instagram Shoutout of the Week: @InternetChav xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @ThanksForGlistening Twitter: @HelloGlisteners

WOW. 2017 is so wild. This week Juan and Sloane ask the following questions: Where is Richard Simmons? Why did Adele win everything? What is Caitlyn Jenner thinking? and Who let that woman in your house? They share their new favorite lubric...err, I mean moisturizers. They open the show with their statement about Moonlight’s big win. Instagram Shoutout of the Week: @youvegotnomale xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @HelloGlisteners wwww.thanksforglistening.com

Hi everybody! WE ARE BACK and so excited to be with you again. This week we are unpacking Lady Gaga’s SUPER BOWL Takeover. We are using the brilliant text penned by @NickRBurroughs to help fully understand her domination. Sloane has a cold and is ready to have this damn baby. Juan too is pregnant, but with feeling. Also Lala Land and the season finale of Mariah’s World...tbh it was terrible. xoxo, Juan and Sloane 

NEW SOCK...SAME SHOE. Welcome to 2017. “All right, we didn’t have a check for this song, so we’ll just say it went to number one, and that’s what it is. Okay.” We’re talking 2017 and Mariah Carey’s role in the aforementioned year moving forward. Serena Williams is such a goddess and she is engaged. Carrie and Debbie–gone to soon. Kim K is  back on insta and that’s a good thing because we have been waiting to exhale. You can’t edit your tweets so be careful my babies.

It’s our favorite time of the year here at TFG too. We have have spent four lifetimes worth of other people’s money on stuff, so we really know about stuff. And on this very special holiday episode we are sharing our stuff knowledge with you and listing our FAVORITE THINGS of 2016. Just in time to spend every dollar you have hidden in you easy-bake oven before the impending end of days in 2017. Make our gags your gifts! Also have you heard of ASMR? Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. It’s super sexy and satisfying and were breaking it down. Instagram Shoutout of the Week: @SatisfyingVideo xoxo, Juan and Sloane, @juanthatyouwant and @iamsloanesteel, respectively. Insta: @ThanksForGlistening Twitter: @HelloGlisteners  

Sloane and Juan are alive and well and living in Paris. Everybody seems to be pooping their pants, which is great. Thanksgiving was delightful, except Juan’s dog almost died. We turned around for one second and lost Kanye forever. She by Sheree has never looked so good and it really is MARIAH’S WORLD. Welcome Home, baby. Welcome home.   Hot Chopix: Kanyegate Lady Gaga is the Best Kenya Moore’s Man is Scary   Instagram Shoutout of the Week: @ChristianDietician So hot. So much good food. Check him out you will SEE.

Stomach bugs and getting thin, Juan might be getting arrested by immigration, Sloane's meeting with Janet Reno, Pittsburg accents, grand dames on instagram, who cares about Carrie Fisher and Harrison Ford?, Marcia Gay Harden is a strapping woman, "I seen her at", "I been knowin her", it's Thanksgiving so Sloane got fired again, Fuck 2016, Kylie Jenner is a prophet, Clowns, Prince and Janet Reno died this year, why does McDonalds never have ice cream?, the revelation voice, Juan's Thanksgiving and Christmas plans, Sloane's mom isn't cooking Thanksgiving dinner and it affected her greatly, Thanksgiving Brunch, Sloane reads the Thanksgiving menu at Rosa Mexicano in New York, Cubana Beauty Queen pregnancy announcement, Hot Chopix, Juan skips the dick to get to Hilliary, Hillary's first appearance after her loss, Sloane thinks HRC is out of fucks to give, Juan thinks Hillary should run for senate again, Sloane can't handle The Real, Ginuwine's dick is at attention and is the pride of America, Sloane gets the urge,

Top and bottom coasters, Brooklyn and Miami, feels strange to be podcasting, Sloane has no more money in the bank just gold doubloons, tectonic shift in our future, Sloane may have passed out from anger, crying from news of the President-Elect, Juan helped at the poles translating Spanish and helping disabled, thoughts on the electoral process, Juan's strange night at the poles, Juan's call for white liberal America to wake up, Juan is a doomsday person, do we need to delete emails and tweets about Trump?, 180 acceptance speech, tax reform is covering up what you're really voting for, the dark web of political correctness, Trump never denied being a racist which was the secret handshake, the Black Lives Matter movement, the tiers of danger, a hierarchy of hate, the 7 stages fo grief, what Hillary's loss means for young women on our country, anger toward 3rd party voters, voter trading, Sloane loves to vote, mandatory voting, technical issues, unproductive Michelle Obama memes, inflatable banana boat and raft

Stevie the Dog is joining us this episode, still in Miami and on the hot mic, wifi and housekeepers, laundry issues, Juan can't relate to the characters in Game of Thrones, passion projects, Cersei hate, needing to know the source material, Sloane needs help letting go of her shirts, the pants shitting happened, old butthole elastic, a delicate balance, shower shitting in Cuba, you and the bucket, the vinegar solution, announcing the son, December will be holiday tips and tricks, Sloane loves voting on election day, Juan wants to "work the poles," working for one gel manicure, confusing and convoluted, rules in different states for campaigning, Stevie keeps interrupting, the ridiculousness of poles, all the Hilary email nonsense, Anthony Weiner and more nonsense Hot Chopix Melania Trump: Copied speech, internet bullying, shut down Twitter accounts, voting for the better choice, Steven Seagal is becoming a Russian citizen Seagal gets the chop and we keep him because he's amazing Melania gets the chop for her s

Inches apart, Sloane and Juan are sitting airplane close to each other, restorative Miami, UPS box sizes, Sloane maternity wear looks, ordering from ASOS, the Sad Charlie Brown, turtle boat neck, womb proportions, jaunty soft beret, Montreal Spy, Sloane is featured in the Miami Herald for her Zika birth announcement, Sam Merlott's restaurant, the hazmat and beekeeper look, Mid-Atlantic dialect, American Horror Story English accent, Juan's Kinky Boots story with Diane Keaton, Sloane doesn't know how to fall in love with a dick and a vagina, straight porn fascination, NPR and dissenting political opinions, friends vs family and political discussions, Juan's socialist bushy beard, knowing who you're marrying, Juan has a dream to have his own room and closet, great wifi for a wedding present, talking to kids about politics, presidential candidate roasting, J-Law was chopped, Billy Bush is a first cousin, the Fox money machine sexual assault fund, the arrogant Trumps, what's a Wiki?, Juan is writing speeches for H

Intro with hosts and co-hosts, the Today Show doesn't give a fuck, Corey Feldman, the trigger warning biography called Coreyography, three tired hooker women, "art", who took the call to book Corey?, droppping the American flag, Sloane dropped a bunch of American flag cupcakes, self-flagellation, paying to go to a Corey party, Juan's dancing instinct, Jonathan Dirt at the nice CVS, almond scented grease paste Hot Chopix Ken Bone Second presidential debate, Bed Bath and Beyond coupons, #visabuxx, vibrators & boyfriends, Kenneth Bone and the Bone Zone, Lenscrafter glass, Sloane's super popular AMA, Reddit user-names, fringe forums, beautiful human submarines, Jennifer Lawrence butthole, insurance fraud, justified killings, is Ken Bone a little simple?, weeble wobble, roxyfoxytangomango, Carlos Danger, butthole sniffing freaks, erratic language Kim Kardashian Fake or not?, Ryan Seacrest and 3 blond hoodrats did it, purchased video, dark web etsy shops, consultant says she's too calm, KK never sweats, ratings

We are back for another week and we are all over the Trump audio this week.  What is the best lube?  How long has Juan known Sloane? All these questions and more... 

It's episode 6 of TFG but the first one you have heard!  Hot Chopix, Ru Pauls Drag race and all kinds of other fabulousness!!! Let us help you forget the color of our skin just like Oprah!!