Caroline Phipps

The Emotional Minefield  Do You Know Where You’re Standing? Are you living in an emotional minefield tiptoeing around other people? Or do others have to tiptoe around you? Last month we discussed hyper-sensitivity and the challenges around the giving and taking of offense. So many of you reached out that I thought it might be helpful to take a closer look at some effective ways to deal with the pressures of these emotionally charged days, particularly with the holiday season just around the corner. As previously touched on in this series, the only power we have is being responsible for ourselves. It’s simply not possible to fully control how others behave.  Communicate with kindness when you feel hurt to clear up any misunderstanding and avoid triggering heightened sensitivity. And be prepared to listen if you have caused hurt. But this only works if everyone involved can rise above the situation and has a genuine desire to make things better, as opposed to trying to establish righteousness. Forcing someb

Feeling offended, and expressing outrage, is now all the rage affecting every aspect of our lives. And short fuses and limited tolerance have their place, of course, when an offense is serious and damaging. But in my inner elegance coaching practice, there’s an increasing hyper-sensitivity to perceived, and real slights that’s become the issue dominating relationships and it’s causing unnecessary pain and confusion. The emotional tripwires created by this heightened sensitivity are becoming increasingly hard to navigate. The last thing most of us want is to cause offense (particularly with loved ones) and this ironically plays right into the hands of those who understand the power of being deliberately offensive for their own ends. The offense can only be caused when we are quick to take offense. Politicians, for example, understand this only too well. The sting is instant and it’s a cheap way to make a splash or feel superior, without having to make any effort. So, why are we so easy to offend? Rudeness, b

The Scars We Create  When Feelings are Bigger than Truth - - In these unsettling times, mental health issues are front and center. Athletes are voicing their struggles with stress and anxiety; we are leaving our jobs in record numbers often citing burn-out and depression and outbursts of disruptive behavior are popping up everywhere from airlines to grocery stores. Today we are encouraged to share how we feel in a way that we never have before. Having grown up in England where such a thing was totally frowned upon, and hence completely unheard of, it’s a welcome relief. It feels good to know that we are not alone in our own struggles and that there is no longer any stigma attached to revealing it or to getting help.  It comes as no surprise, with all the challenges we’re facing, that in my own life, and work, I am encountering emotional turmoil and overflow of greater intensity than ever before. This is a good thing when the issues are thoughtfully explored, and effort is made to understand more about why